F. I have had the worst F'ing, F'ing week. The older I get the more diminished my tolerance for dumb mother f'ers gets. Unbelievable. Now, I have categorized a new style of poetry entitled the "anger-vent, hate sans-hate, haiku." Before I share my composition with you, there are some qualifiers to this dialogue of which you must be aware...
1. I am of mixed heritage. One part Mexican, two parts tomato juice, a part lime, three parts vodka. Shake and drink. Delicious.
2. My family is Catholic. I try, but I am not very good at it. "They" say it is like riding a bike. Someone stole my bike. That does not bode well.
3. I am really a good person who simply gets stuck in "bad" situations. I feel like bad situations are like stray dogs. They just spring up and it seems like they are always hungry. Dammit.
4. I have an extremely low tolerance for stupidity and, begrudgingly accept when I, myself, have done something stupid.
5. I am an optimist at heart.
6. My heart is buried deep within a blackened chest of rock and oak.
7. One of my most favorite things is to see people get hurt when they do something stupid.
Unless, Unless, Unless, they hurt themselves really badly, in which case we all have a good laugh once the bleeding stops. Have you ever stepped on a tack? Wow, that little tack hurts BIG time.
Good, now that we have clarified these minor housekeeping issues, let us proceed to the artistic medium of poetry discussed above.
I present to you my first ever "anger-vent, hate sans-hate, haiku"...
Motherfucker You
you cause me much pain and grief
I don't know you Pigs!
Sabes Que? My Man!
Ash Wednesday Was the day,
you prevented me!
From leaving my work?
You blocked my car in the lot.
I forgot one thing.
Silly me, buddy!
That's right. Jesus loves you more.
Know why that is guy?
Oh yeah, I know why!
Because you're more Mexican,
than I look to you.
Sabes Que, Asshole?
God and Jesus are color blind!
That is what I'm told.
At least I try to...
understand where you come from,
reciprocated?
I think not my man!
don't give a shit about Man?
entiendes? Guess not!
Check out this next one
try to secure the passport,
but Pops lost his docs
Talk to Senator,
well, at least his aides. Oh yeah!
came to fruition?
Not likely. Not yet.
Try to call. Aide won't Answer!
That dumb ass bastard.
Yes, I have been calm.
The Yoga has assured that.
I remain myself.
That passport had better,
be in my father's hands soon.
If not, oh hells bells!
Politicians, man.
Always writing checks with mouths
that asses can't cash.
Fast mouth Politics
Fat mouth Politicians, too.
The best are all gone.
Sabes Que? No, what?
Speaky Spanis? Si, pero,
You speaky Inglis?
Sorry lady, but...
You gotta call back later.
y sabes por que?
Por que, I am mad!
I speaky spanis, but you...
You no speak Inglis!
I am mad as hell.
I do not have to take it.
At least not sitting.
I will stand. I will.
And you can push me down, down.
But I will get up.
You will tire first.
I will stand just to beat you.
My will is stronger.
Will is principle.
I am a principled man.
You, you have nothing!
Yet another sir.
Lest I leave you sour, my friend.
the wife and the dog.
Those two, if non others.
They two are of principle.
A dog you ask? Yes.
The wife and the dog.
Principle is in the eyes,
and the way they walk.
You too, would be wise,
to find a map leading to,
a finely hid spot.
dig and you may find,
gilded, brass, boxes filled with
principles and gold.
The message disguised,
but not completely obscured,
instructs to search well.
For principle will...
among many other things,
not seek you out friend!
You must find it and,
trap it, and hold it tightly.
It will escape you.
Once trapped, lock it up.
Use it every day, and oft.
and do you know why?
Consideration,
and peace, come from principle.
Now do you see why?
Our cups runneth over,
we are at capacity,
with idiocy.
So, tell me something,
that I know not yet my friend.
That one I have heard.
I leave you with this.
help people always, because
it is the right thing!
Well, that was my foray into the venting haiku. I hope you like it. I am unsure if the proper haiku form is expected to be connected by thought throughout a whole 5-7-5 unit, or if the lines are to be independent of one another? Well, I will disclaim any knowledge of being a haiku grandmaster, but I am getting quite good at Su Doku. No relation? Sorry, I thought you guys might be cousins.
Despite the haikuisms, I have to tell you, I feel infinitely better after that composition. Now, if I can just get this Measles inoculation out of the way I can relax a little bit. As I sit here, I wonder if the weather in Algeria is relatively the same as that in Texas. It sounds odd, yes, I know. If you look at a map, however, you may just say, "hey, I wonder that too!"
Well, if anyone out there is in fact reading my anonymous blog, which is done for my safety and that of all the children and the blind, I thank you. I do intend to keep writing more often, as it saves me the money from going to a psychologist. Anyway, a psychologist would just tell me that I am either fucked up, or normal, which, I already know. So thank you for your patronage. Perhaps soon I will have enough patronage to get that boat to travel to the new world for spices. I do like marjoram and paprika.
So, if anyone has anything to tell me, submit a response. I intend to put some links to some friend's blogs and other such things very soon, so stay posted.
Enjoy your end of the Weeks and have some chocolate or pie. You will, undoubtedly, feel better.
16.2.07
Supposed To?
Supposed to! Supposed, as defined by the so-called "experts," whatever that title entails, or requires, is defined as (1)(a) Pretended, or (b) Alleged; and (2)(a) Believed or Imagined, or (b) Considered probable or certain, expected, or (c) Understood; and finally, (3) Permitted.
Who, exactly, is doing this pretending, alleging, believing, expecting, understanding, or permitting?
I am 'supposed' to behave. I am 'supposed' to act as a proper adult. I am 'supposed' to head to bed at some reasonable hour. Who is doing this supposing? Suppose, for a moment, that I do not wish to do as I am supposed. Seems a little circular I suppose. I suppose that I will try eliminate the word from my vocabulary. I suppose you should as well, do you not suppose that may be helpful. Some suppose that it would.
I have grown, in the past few days that I have been pondering this word, perhaps one of the great imponderables, to hate this word. I simply do not like the way it rolls off the tongue, nor the way it looks. I believe the root of this anger and frustration is not with the word itself, so much as what the word connotes.
Think about it! Does anyone present you with hypotheticals when something good happens? I suppose not! People present hypotheticals, most often in my experience, when trying to make you either (1) see an example of how you should have done something absent your proper execution of a particular task or (2) when you have done something that they disapprove of. For example, "Suppose you had use dish soap to clean that 'Pepsi' from that DVD instead of High Abrasive 'Ajax' cleanser. Don't you Suppose that would have been better?" You see my point. Well maybe you don't but with a pinch of time and a scintilla of effort, I Suppose that you could.
I just do not like the fact that there are people who are Supposed to Suppose how I should act.
I expect that you will consider it probable and understand if I will no longer permit the usage of the word Suppose in my company any longer considering this sentence contains four alternatives, perhaps maybe more I believe (5), of the word Suppose.
Good luck and enjoy the rest of your day.
Until next time when we will lament the word 'used.' Does anyone really think that getting used to something is a good thing in most circumstances? 'Used' to it? Say it out loud and see how odd it really sounds!
Who, exactly, is doing this pretending, alleging, believing, expecting, understanding, or permitting?
I am 'supposed' to behave. I am 'supposed' to act as a proper adult. I am 'supposed' to head to bed at some reasonable hour. Who is doing this supposing? Suppose, for a moment, that I do not wish to do as I am supposed. Seems a little circular I suppose. I suppose that I will try eliminate the word from my vocabulary. I suppose you should as well, do you not suppose that may be helpful. Some suppose that it would.
I have grown, in the past few days that I have been pondering this word, perhaps one of the great imponderables, to hate this word. I simply do not like the way it rolls off the tongue, nor the way it looks. I believe the root of this anger and frustration is not with the word itself, so much as what the word connotes.
Think about it! Does anyone present you with hypotheticals when something good happens? I suppose not! People present hypotheticals, most often in my experience, when trying to make you either (1) see an example of how you should have done something absent your proper execution of a particular task or (2) when you have done something that they disapprove of. For example, "Suppose you had use dish soap to clean that 'Pepsi' from that DVD instead of High Abrasive 'Ajax' cleanser. Don't you Suppose that would have been better?" You see my point. Well maybe you don't but with a pinch of time and a scintilla of effort, I Suppose that you could.
I just do not like the fact that there are people who are Supposed to Suppose how I should act.
I expect that you will consider it probable and understand if I will no longer permit the usage of the word Suppose in my company any longer considering this sentence contains four alternatives, perhaps maybe more I believe (5), of the word Suppose.
Good luck and enjoy the rest of your day.
Until next time when we will lament the word 'used.' Does anyone really think that getting used to something is a good thing in most circumstances? 'Used' to it? Say it out loud and see how odd it really sounds!
14.2.07
I really should write more!
I experienced synchronicity on Monday February 12, 2007 at approximately 11:00 a.m. I had not had such an experience in some time, so I thought it curious. I walked passed an informational board, in my school. The board listed staff and faculty. Immediately upon looking at the board I saw the President of the University's name. I saw only that name as my inspection of the board was cursory. I opened the door to the restroom some 3 to 4 seconds later and nearly bashed the President of the University with the door.
As an aside I suspect that some readers are wondering, "Wow, you piss in the same spot as the President of the University." To which I would respond, "He is not that big of a deal, and If I could just as easily piss on him,...well I probably would not. It is, however, worth noting that I have not yet graduated. Because of this non-graduate status and the unknown result of my studies, we should not rule out the 'pissing on the President policy.'"
Back to the synchronicity. I almost bashed him in the head. At nearly the same time I thought, "damn, I just read his name {the President}. Upon feeling and thinking [how does one describe experiencing and experience without saying 'I experienced and experience' anyway] this synchronicity I thought of the 'Police' (not the police) because of their song, and later double album, "Synchronicity." That made me think of writing songs, which I also do, and just writing in general. That has lead me to write, and you to later read, these words before you.
Therefore, I would like to thank 1) Me, for reading the President's name, on Monday February 12, 2007 at approximately 11:00 a.m. and all subsequent, associated thoughts; 2) the President for almost getting his head bashed in, and moreover, for initiating a urination at some point just before 11:00 a.m. on that very same day; 3) the 'Police,' and certainly not the police for writing and performing "Synchroncity" and finally; 4) Carl Jung for giving what I felt a name.
Thanks.
As an aside I suspect that some readers are wondering, "Wow, you piss in the same spot as the President of the University." To which I would respond, "He is not that big of a deal, and If I could just as easily piss on him,...well I probably would not. It is, however, worth noting that I have not yet graduated. Because of this non-graduate status and the unknown result of my studies, we should not rule out the 'pissing on the President policy.'"
Back to the synchronicity. I almost bashed him in the head. At nearly the same time I thought, "damn, I just read his name {the President}. Upon feeling and thinking [how does one describe experiencing and experience without saying 'I experienced and experience' anyway] this synchronicity I thought of the 'Police' (not the police) because of their song, and later double album, "Synchronicity." That made me think of writing songs, which I also do, and just writing in general. That has lead me to write, and you to later read, these words before you.
Therefore, I would like to thank 1) Me, for reading the President's name, on Monday February 12, 2007 at approximately 11:00 a.m. and all subsequent, associated thoughts; 2) the President for almost getting his head bashed in, and moreover, for initiating a urination at some point just before 11:00 a.m. on that very same day; 3) the 'Police,' and certainly not the police for writing and performing "Synchroncity" and finally; 4) Carl Jung for giving what I felt a name.
Thanks.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
