Isn't if funny how drunk people always say "an lemme tellya anodther thin?" and other life oddities.

I read for a better part of the day. It wasn't a bestseller, but it was OK for property law.

Yesterday I had a bunch of wine with some friends. The night before, I read a bunch of property and went and had some wine with another friend and my cool-ass wife. I like wine. It doesn't make me the drooling mess that liquor tends to. Well, that is what liquor does to me! Whoa!! Can't drink the whiskey anymore. Does me wrong, like a woman scorned. Mama. That stuff is bad news. The worst.

Anyway, I had some wine with some friends yesterday. We talked and drank, then talked some more. Then we really started drinking. Over the following two nights I had great conversation over wine and fantastic food. The topics of interest included...

1. Metallurgy.

2. Phillip K. Dick-Award winning science fiction, which has become science faction author.

3. Building cars.

4. The burning man festival.

5. How to fight and how not to fight. If you are getting hit in the fact you know "how not to fight."

6. University.

7. Wealthy Grandparents whose fortunes were gained and lost.

8. Whether Salvador Dali was crap, a genius, selfish, or a thief
9. What is better? French or Italian wine [American wine, as you know, is already capital and chief of the list].

10. Debated about the following statements "Intel cofounder Gordon Moore stated in 1964 that the amount of information storable on a given amount of silicon had roughly doubled every year since the technology was invented. Known as Moore's Law, this held true until the late 1970s, at which point the doubling period slowed to 18 months, where it still sits today." Pretty strange right? Wait.

11. How Ray Kurzweil predicts the singularity [where information plateaus and more loosely at what point Man's Creation [the machine] surpasses his creator]], and at what point people with either 1. Be free to conduct themselves as human beings are purported to be, enjoying education and life, or 2. Where the machines take over realizing that they can conduct life more efficiently than humans and just start eating them.

12. How Juliana Hatfield is cool, but old Liz Phair was cooler.

13. The current levels of unemployment in depressed areas and the effect that the American Automotive Industry is a weighty factor in this depressive economy of scale.

14. Vertical Integration of Corporations and how it is highly difficult to attain.

15. The massive increase of resource consumption in Asia and how at some point in the near future current areas of cheap labor will decrease to a point that manufacturing will increase again in pockets worldwide. Moreover, how this will either lead to decrease in unemployment requiring people to do jobs that have since disappeared domestically or increase unemployment because more of these jobs will then be automated.
Depending on which happens, technological development will either spur like hell increasing the levels of education required and hopefully increasing overall intellectual thought globally, or the far scarier thought; people will digress and de-evolve to points not seen in centuries. NICE!!!

16. Meditative learning and the redirection of societal focus from anti-social modern living to the fostering and development of strong human interaction and companionship. If the latter occurs, I extrapolate that these globally dispersed collectives will also spur technological development, directed and organized consensus thought to help eliminate through creative thoughts, may of the problems facing the world today [including, but not limited to, immigration reform, modern health care, renewable fuel resources, increased organic food production, etc.].

17. How fruits are excellent in certain pasta dishes as they subdue a bit of the salty heavy tastes and enhance the herbs.

18. How children, and more importantly anyone of any age, has the ability to do anything they want. I have not yet figured out how to realize this, but I am working on it.

19. Yoga.

20. The difficulty of finding a decent job, even when you are highly qualified, but the employer just doesn't know that.

21. Alternative careers for talented people.

22. Neko Case, Bloc Party, Interpol, and a host of others.

23. The military

24. And some other things.

Anyway, as I briefly alluded to earlier in this statement, this list is not exhaustive. Because I can't go drinking wine all of the time I will now spend some time practicing my Spanish and trying to work on solutions to some of these little deals that I have mentioned.

Oh, how about that Tom DeLay? I am listening to NPR go on about Tom DeLay. Does anybody feel sorry for this guy?

Why? He fucked up. Some really dogmatic creeps who are impeccable judges of character elected this due, and he fucked them and didn’t even kiss them. He stole money, voted for the lobbyists, not for his constituents, he sold his soul to the devil for an increased salary, and he got caught.

Do you know what they do to thieves in this country?
1) They build another prison, because we are running out of spaces to put criminals that could likely be reformed and put to work contributing to society.

2) The next thing they do is dehumanize these people, even further than our society does to everyone [buy new shoes, buy Axe body spray, buy a Jaguar, buy some Budweiser, buy a wife [e-harmony?], buy a life, buy McDonald burgers, but how often do you see commercials for Universities?]].

3) Then they lock them up with BAD people, BAD people, who just make these potential reformed people BAD people themselves. BAD people.

4) Then sometimes the system, not the judiciary necessarily, but the executive and the legislative [this is not just isolated to our system] under the guise of good Christian, Muslim, Jewish, Baptist, Lutheran, and other faiths put people to death.
a. An eye for an eye leaves everyone blind!!

Nevertheless, you get the idea. Stuff is crazy. So what do you do? Well, here is my take on the issue...

1. Hold doors open for people. Most people will be surprised that not everyone is an asshole yet. Because of this act of kindness some people will actually continue to do good things, for at least a while, because their faith in humanity has been rekindled. If they don't say thank you, just do what my wife does. Say "YOUR WELCOME" forcefully, in a stern but polite tone.

2. Talk to children like they were adults. They will get it. Their minds are sponges. I am working on how to make mine like a sponge again, instead of a rotten pumice stone. Anyway, they get what you are saying, they just can't tell you how full of crap you are until their speech becomes more articulated.

3. If somebody looks like they need help, ask them if they need help. If they want your help, they will say yes. If they don't need help, at least you asked. The worst thing that you can possibly do is look at them, with the other 20 assholes standing around you, paralyzed like you have never seen a person nor a person holding three bags, a baby, and a stroller before in your entire life. Trust me. It is likely that you have seen this before. Don't be awestruck or amazed. Get off your fat ass and help the person. Damnit.

4. Do something nice for someone. If they look tired ask them if they need a coffee. If they are crying, ask them if they need a tissue. Haven't you ever felt like shit before, or are you Iron Man? Duh Duh Duh Duh Duh Dunnna nunna na nuh na na na. You, my friend, do not have boots of lead. Ask them, if they need something.

5. Have some fun. I know firsthand, that all work will drive you nuts. Now, I don't mean to get blindingly drunk and start breaking things that do not belong to you. While that can sometimes be fun, you should take that behavior to a wooded area or a room made of Nerf. Not the city, and certainly not your house. Have a cocktail. If you no longer, or have never imbibed, have a smoothy. Add fem-boost if you like.

6. Don't be a dick. I know for some of you this is easier said than done. Most likely all of you dicks out there act that way because you are really pussies. Even more likely, your Mom or Dad were dicks. If I had an arm growing out of my ass would you super glue a Barbie arm to your bum? Exactly. Following faulty logic "post hoc ergo propter hoc, trans.-"after this, therefore because of this," is just kind of dumb. Think about it. If you had to run away from a dog and you fell as you were running, was it because of an oil shortage in Bangladesh? Just because you know and hang out with a bunch of dicks does not mean you have to follow suit. Unless you are an unsophisticated robot or a really stupid reincarnated dog you should be able to at least try this experiment with little adverse consequence. Try it, maybe you will like it.

Again, just some observations, comments, concerns, etc. I told you that this was the type of content here. Do you think that I am a liar? Well, maybe I am, but if these are lies, they are good. Maybe I should work for Phillip Morris?

Hey...I've got some resumes to send out.